Saturday, January 1, 2011
Goodbye 2010 ... Hello 2011
Wow, it's here. 2011.
I was sitting on my friend's Scott's sofa (actually, technically it's not his but his dad's) and listening to Goldfrapp's "I Wanna Life" when I got to thinking, strangely quickly, about what my year was like in 2010. At the start of it I was so hopeful that everything would be brilliantly perfect; my mother and I were homeless by then but still happy that we had a roof over our head, food on the table -- AND CABLE. We hadn't had cable for I think three months before moving into the motel at a moment's notice so it was nice to finally watch American Idol and not have to worry about what streaming video links were high quality and whether or not they were still there. I had a feeling that 2010 would be a year when I would finally find my place in the world and overall have a good year.
Even though many things happened in that time to now, it was all worth it in the end; the experiences of 2010 have been eye-opening and shocking, a right royal smack in the face here and there but it's always good to have that to really help things to sink in.
It feels like two years ago when I was removed from living with my mother by the Ministry of Children and Family Development (which is a totally misleading government department name as there is no development between children and their families) and I lived with my foster dad, in which I won't give out any names. It still blows my mind that my mother did physically attack me, in which she has no recollection of it. It still blows my mind that for three months I had been a slave to somebody I didn't even know, in which my foster dad was oblivious to his laziness and didn't realize the toll having to do the dishes every night when I could have been studying was on me. I don't think anyone really understood what it was like for me to have my home taken away from me, my cornerstone, and still have to go through school. I admit I was stupid and selfish to shy away from reality and hide behind my computer monitor, but at the same time I think it almost helped me to achieve very many things. More on this later.
I'll never forget the experience of having my mother physically attack me, and then put into foster care. Being in foster care solidified everything for me; everything kind of slipped into place from where it was once absent, if that even makes any sense to anyone reading this (and if you've read this far then congrats to you, are you yawning yet? HA!). I can't describe what it was exactly that slipped into place but things started making sense to me. Maybe it was my views on the real world that solidified, or maybe it was about who I was and what I wanted to do that became clearer. I can't put my finger on it but everything just kind of fit. Even though I grew increasingly restless and unhappy by the end of the third month, it was still an experience I think I needed to have. In a way it's like it made me stronger as a person. I think that's what I'm trying to get at.
The summer flew by as if it had only lasted for a week. I can't even put my finger on it. I don't why it was but by mid-July, I grew increasingly unhappy having to slave away. I think it was because I was pulling more weight at work than what I thought I should have. My boss at my work place this summer seemed a little impassive at everything that was going on and it only struck me nearer to the end of the season that he did put in a lot of work this year due to the new location, and I hadn't done as much work as he had. I'd had many occasions where I snapped on people I shouldn't have (in which the only customer that I apologized to didn't take the apology so good, which kind of shocked and angered me) and I never realized why it was that I was snapping on them, and in my eyes at the beginning, it seemed like they were being selfish and stupid. What it was though was they were asking for things we never used to do before, as well as having more responsibilities dumped on me than I was used to. It was a shocking year and I think it's made me a better and assertive worker, so I thank my boss for that. I don't know where I'd be without him in terms of working.
School started in September and I remember being so excited that I could finally get a start on Grade 12 and work my behind off to pull A's from my you-know-where. My goals are continually being met and I am passing Grade 12 very successfully, and I'm proud of myself for that. The difference being at the learning center compared to the high school was that my instructors are very committed to making sure their pupils know what they're doing, and I love the feeling of being acknowledged for when I'm stuck, and I have three people I'd like to thank for that: Miles, Barb and Sharron. Without them, I would be, out-of-character, just scraping by Grade 12 just to get my Dogwood so I could go to post-secondary school.
The weather outside became increasingly confusing and fluctuated being -10 to 3 degrees Celsius, but that was the least of my concerns (except for when I stepped outside for a cigarette). I sent in my information to John Casablanca's School of Applied Arts and they called me the next day, funnily enough while I was hanging out with friends, and I am happy to say that I have been accepted into the school -- it's just a matter now of getting the registration and the deposit in and then I'll be good to go. That was the thing that I was seriously worried about as JCI needs at least $100 within a month of registration, and either the rest of the $500 deposit over a period of five months or however; as well, and stupidly, there's a section on the registration form where they ask for emergency contacts, presumably in Vancouver, and I have nobody to use as my emergency contact. HAHA. I`ll figure something out.
And now here I am, in Tsawwassen with my buddy Scott and having an amazing time, and last night, even if a blur, was amazing -- there is explicit video proof. And last night, spontaneously, we all shouted, "ROCK ON LIKE IT'S 2011!"
So my advice to you, the reader whose somehow read this far, is to just rock on. Let 2011 be the best year you've ever had.
Stay gold, lovelies!
- Colten.
xoxo
I was sitting on my friend's Scott's sofa (actually, technically it's not his but his dad's) and listening to Goldfrapp's "I Wanna Life" when I got to thinking, strangely quickly, about what my year was like in 2010. At the start of it I was so hopeful that everything would be brilliantly perfect; my mother and I were homeless by then but still happy that we had a roof over our head, food on the table -- AND CABLE. We hadn't had cable for I think three months before moving into the motel at a moment's notice so it was nice to finally watch American Idol and not have to worry about what streaming video links were high quality and whether or not they were still there. I had a feeling that 2010 would be a year when I would finally find my place in the world and overall have a good year.
Even though many things happened in that time to now, it was all worth it in the end; the experiences of 2010 have been eye-opening and shocking, a right royal smack in the face here and there but it's always good to have that to really help things to sink in.
It feels like two years ago when I was removed from living with my mother by the Ministry of Children and Family Development (which is a totally misleading government department name as there is no development between children and their families) and I lived with my foster dad, in which I won't give out any names. It still blows my mind that my mother did physically attack me, in which she has no recollection of it. It still blows my mind that for three months I had been a slave to somebody I didn't even know, in which my foster dad was oblivious to his laziness and didn't realize the toll having to do the dishes every night when I could have been studying was on me. I don't think anyone really understood what it was like for me to have my home taken away from me, my cornerstone, and still have to go through school. I admit I was stupid and selfish to shy away from reality and hide behind my computer monitor, but at the same time I think it almost helped me to achieve very many things. More on this later.
I'll never forget the experience of having my mother physically attack me, and then put into foster care. Being in foster care solidified everything for me; everything kind of slipped into place from where it was once absent, if that even makes any sense to anyone reading this (and if you've read this far then congrats to you, are you yawning yet? HA!). I can't describe what it was exactly that slipped into place but things started making sense to me. Maybe it was my views on the real world that solidified, or maybe it was about who I was and what I wanted to do that became clearer. I can't put my finger on it but everything just kind of fit. Even though I grew increasingly restless and unhappy by the end of the third month, it was still an experience I think I needed to have. In a way it's like it made me stronger as a person. I think that's what I'm trying to get at.
The summer flew by as if it had only lasted for a week. I can't even put my finger on it. I don't why it was but by mid-July, I grew increasingly unhappy having to slave away. I think it was because I was pulling more weight at work than what I thought I should have. My boss at my work place this summer seemed a little impassive at everything that was going on and it only struck me nearer to the end of the season that he did put in a lot of work this year due to the new location, and I hadn't done as much work as he had. I'd had many occasions where I snapped on people I shouldn't have (in which the only customer that I apologized to didn't take the apology so good, which kind of shocked and angered me) and I never realized why it was that I was snapping on them, and in my eyes at the beginning, it seemed like they were being selfish and stupid. What it was though was they were asking for things we never used to do before, as well as having more responsibilities dumped on me than I was used to. It was a shocking year and I think it's made me a better and assertive worker, so I thank my boss for that. I don't know where I'd be without him in terms of working.
School started in September and I remember being so excited that I could finally get a start on Grade 12 and work my behind off to pull A's from my you-know-where. My goals are continually being met and I am passing Grade 12 very successfully, and I'm proud of myself for that. The difference being at the learning center compared to the high school was that my instructors are very committed to making sure their pupils know what they're doing, and I love the feeling of being acknowledged for when I'm stuck, and I have three people I'd like to thank for that: Miles, Barb and Sharron. Without them, I would be, out-of-character, just scraping by Grade 12 just to get my Dogwood so I could go to post-secondary school.
The weather outside became increasingly confusing and fluctuated being -10 to 3 degrees Celsius, but that was the least of my concerns (except for when I stepped outside for a cigarette). I sent in my information to John Casablanca's School of Applied Arts and they called me the next day, funnily enough while I was hanging out with friends, and I am happy to say that I have been accepted into the school -- it's just a matter now of getting the registration and the deposit in and then I'll be good to go. That was the thing that I was seriously worried about as JCI needs at least $100 within a month of registration, and either the rest of the $500 deposit over a period of five months or however; as well, and stupidly, there's a section on the registration form where they ask for emergency contacts, presumably in Vancouver, and I have nobody to use as my emergency contact. HAHA. I`ll figure something out.
And now here I am, in Tsawwassen with my buddy Scott and having an amazing time, and last night, even if a blur, was amazing -- there is explicit video proof. And last night, spontaneously, we all shouted, "ROCK ON LIKE IT'S 2011!"
So my advice to you, the reader whose somehow read this far, is to just rock on. Let 2011 be the best year you've ever had.
Stay gold, lovelies!
- Colten.
xoxo
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